(Part 2) Learning to Put Yourself First: A Raw Talk on Self-Worth

Feeling overwhelmed lately? You’re not alone.
In this episode, we’re sharing real reminders to ground you, guide you, and help you breathe through the heaviness.

🎧 What you’ll hear:

• Why gratitude matters even in hard seasons
• The quiet power of sharing your story
• The importance of protecting your energy
• How to recognize true support
• Why it’s okay not to be okay

This is your space to feel seen, heard, and encouraged.
🎥 Watch the full video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S0lm7BPvKi8

✨ If it speaks to you, share it with a friend. Leave a review. Come back for more.

 #PodcastLife #MentalHealthMatters #ChristianEncouragement #SoulCare #HonestConversations #FaithBasedHealing #YouAreNotAlone #PeaceInTheStorm #PodcastCommunity #LifeTalks 

About the host:

Jennifer Beckford is the founder of the Nicholas Stewart Project, a loving mother, and a believer in the power of community development and its resilience.

For as long as she can remember, Jennifer has been passionate about helping others. Throughout her adult life, she continues to give her time in the service of helping others, even when, on occasions, it seems impossible!

Jennifer says: “I feel compelled to do at least one voluntary task each week”.


Follow us:
Facebook: @nicholasstewartproject
Facebook: @thetrumpetsounds
LinkedIn: The Nicholas Stewart Project
Instagram: @_thensp

Transcript

[0:00]
Jennifer: Greetings, greetings my friends. How are you today? We are alive, despite the circumstances of life. God be praised.

Because I just do—and I don’t talk—even sometimes when I’m really hurting, I don’t talk. I just say, “Lord, please help me.” That’s why I appreciate this space where we can speak.

Somebody out there, for whom this is meant—because this isn’t for everybody—it might help. Someone might say, “Okay, I can relate to that,” and they might make a change.

We can make changes—changes for the better. Not that we won’t help others, but we must look after ourselves, too. Because if we don’t look after ourselves, we can’t look after everyone else. The empire falls if we can’t look after—
Veronica: That’s right. That’s right.

Jennifer: That’s not my empire.
Veronica: Not your empire!

Jennifer: Listen, listen. I have to make some changes. In my personal life, I know I do. Like I was packing stuff, and I said, “No, no, no. I’m not doing all of this today.” I told myself, “Three things today, the rest tomorrow.”

So I’ve started pacing myself. Even today, I didn’t do much, but I was at the computer doing stuff, and before I knew it—I had to say, “Lock off, lock off. There’s another day.”

I’m learning moderation.

Veronica: When I’m hurt or going through stuff, I sit with myself. I talk with God.

There have been times I’ve cried to God in tears—just having a chat. Over the years, people would say, “Veronica, how do you do it? You’re always so happy.” They’d ask, “How are you coping without their dad?”

And I’d think, you see what you see because I build myself. I pray. I cry. I do what I need to do. But I sit with that hurt.

Jennifer: Yeah. And maybe it’s one of those things where the pain is so deep, you just can’t share it. Even now, I’ve got lots of friends and love around me, but if I’m deeply hurt, I’d still sit with it on my own.

Because sometimes, I don’t know if the other person could hold me in that moment.

Veronica: Mm.

Jennifer: I have a few—again, a few—that I can reach out to. And when I do, I get that energy. They don’t just tell me what I want to hear. They give me wholesome words, encouragement, guidance.

Veronica: And that guidance is rare.

Jennifer: Very rare. Especially when you’re really hurting, you don’t want to be misunderstood—not this time.

Veronica: Not this time around.

Jennifer: So when I reach out, it’s because I don’t know what to do. I might think I can manage, but I need confirmation. And I tell you, those people give me the right counsel.

Those are the people I embrace. The ones who can help me carry it.

Veronica: Yeah. These days, we need that energy.

Jennifer: And when it comes with the right energy—it uplifts. Because sometimes, as they say in Jamaica, you don’t know your head from your doorpost.

When you’re in that space, you just need someone to listen. Maybe you made a mistake—you don’t want to be misunderstood. You want someone to really hear you. And if they don’t understand, they should ask, “What exactly do you mean by that?”

Veronica: Exactly.

Jennifer: That makes it easier.

Veronica: And the people who really care, they pick up on it. They see it in your eyes, in your energy.

Jennifer: That’s right.

Veronica: I’ve had friends and family say, “What’s going on with you today?” because they just knew something was off.

Jennifer: Mhm.

Veronica: And sometimes, I’ll break down—but after I let it out, I move on.

Jennifer: And thank God for those friends. When you’re down and out, it’s like sitting on a chair—you think the chair is sturdy, but all of a sudden, you fall.

Veronica: And who’s going to pick you up?

Jennifer: That’s the question. You see, I’ve been climbing that chair for a while, and I might laugh, but I still need help.

Veronica: Of course. But my first point of call would still be myself. I’d say, “Veronica, how are you going to get back up now?” I don’t even know why that is.

Jennifer: Life is sudden. You feel like you’ve got it all together, then boom—something changes.

Veronica: Just like that.

Jennifer: You're with friends, family, work people, sitting on your metaphorical chair—and suddenly, you fall. That kind of suddenness causes trauma. You can’t think straight.

And in my culture, they might laugh first, then help. Or help while laughing. But you, the one who’s fallen—you’re embarrassed.

Veronica: You wonder, “Will they even come quick enough?”

Jennifer: That’s right. And you hope someone will help as quickly as you would help them.

Veronica: But sometimes we do tumble, and it’s okay.

Jennifer: I was on the phone with a friend recently—she had her tumble too. We were tumbling together!

Veronica: That’s what me and my friends do.

Jennifer: And we just laughed. We were like, “What is this?”—talking about our calamities. And I said, “God, I thank you that even in the midst of this, you let us laugh.”

Veronica: But some people can’t laugh in their pain.

Jennifer: That’s true. It depends. I’ve had tumbles where I couldn’t laugh either. That’s when you need those friends to carry you.

Veronica: When I’m going through a tough time, people need to approach me at the right time. If you keep pushing and asking, I’ll shut down.

Jennifer: You need to arrive right. Say the right things at the right time.

Veronica: Yes! Because if you don’t, it just causes more pain.

Jennifer: It’s true. Don’t misdiagnose my pain. Don’t just say “everything will be okay” or “don’t worry.” I know that already. Let me feel what I’m feeling.

Veronica: Don’t dismiss it.

Jennifer: Don’t ask if I’m okay—just be there. Pick me up. If you don’t know what to say, be quiet and help.

Veronica: But you know, Jennifer, sometimes I wonder—are our expectations too high?

Jennifer: Hmm.

Veronica: We expect people to meet our emotional needs, and when they don’t, we turn inward. We take on 10 tasks for other people, still struggling with our own.

Jennifer: That’s a sad truth.

Veronica: I love old-time sayings—“Each one help one.” And “Seek a friend before you need one.” If you see your brother standing by the way, don’t pass him by—give a helping hand.

Jennifer: That’s what would make the world a better place.

Veronica: Amen.

Jennifer: Because everyone goes through life. The world is spinning, always changing. You might feel okay now—but someone else is struggling.

Veronica: Yep.

Jennifer: If you’re strong, help the one who’s weak. The angels in heaven will rejoice.

Veronica: That’s real.

Jennifer: But we make assumptions. We misinterpret people. Sometimes people struggle so much, they can’t say the right things—because mentally, they’re not okay.